Faith vs. Knowledge.

How is it possible that both science and religion exist? More so, how is it possible that they are both equally motivating to different people? Don't get me wrong, I'm not saying that science and religion are opposites and cannot be part of each other, I just don't think that either one can replace the other. I think that God has given science and logic to us to help us explain him in a way that our brains can understand.

If I were asked to prove my faith using science, I would say simply this; "Invent a new color." If you can think of a color that doesn't already exist on the visible spectrum, then you are God, you have disproved my beliefs, and you win this shiny new nickel. That's how simple my belief is. Colors. Nothing can explain to me logically why it is that someone like me, with a crazy imagination, who is pretty intelligent and "with it", cannot possibly invent a new color. I cannot even perceive that concept. Therefore, in my mind, God must exist. If there is no way I can learn to do that, then there must be something outside of all the knowledge that exists in the universe, and in my mind, that can only be God. Simple as that.

Now, maybe everyone doesn't think on terms like that, but you have to think that there is some truth to the way I think. How is it that we cannot even IMAGINE making something beyond what exists, much less actually creating it? Because, simply put, all that exists isn't all that exists. All that exists to the extent of human knowledge doesn't cover it. There IS something else, otherwise we wouldn't ever think that there was.

(For this next part, I must first issue an apology. Katrina, you will be my example for this next area, simply because it makes my point better. Don't take it personal. You know I think you rock.)

Here is an equation that cannot possibly be explained if you take God out of it. Science cant solve this one. How is it possible that Katrina and I disagree on several huge points in the field of ethics, yet we believe in the same God? She doesn't pirate music, I do. She doesn't cuss at all ever, I do sometimes. Sorry God :( She likes Justin Bieber, I don't. When it comes to God's word, we have VERY different interpretations, or at least, applications. Yet when it comes down to it, we believe in the exact same God. How can that be? It cant, unless there was a God to create us. I don't see how two separate humans could possibly come up with different believes from the same exact motivation minus circumstance. My life has lead me different places than hers, therefore I believe the way I do, and she believes the way she does. She believes in a more exact sense than me. She would be able to argue her beliefs with the best of them, and they would leave that room stumped. That girl knows her stuff. She knows her beliefs, and nothing can deny that knowledge to her. I know what I believe, and I know why I believe it. I'm not always sure on all the exact topics. My belief is more based on personal circumstance. I believe in God because nothing short of His divine intervention could have made me what I am today from what I was. We both believe in the same exact God, just in different ways and for different reasons. Yet as different as we are, I would do anything for her. God has put us in each others lives for a reason. Mostly so we can argue, I guess. But I think that she helps to make our church a deadly force of God against all doubters. With her political knowledge and biblical backing, and my undeniable faith and sheer tenacity of will, I don't think there is an unbeliever on this earth we couldn't argue the pants off of.

That's just one example of what I think is so beautiful about human nature. Nothing could have created me so exactly different from everyone else who believes the same as me. Katrina is just one of the many people who I could have mentioned, she just happened to be someone I was talking to today and it made me think of this.

As my dad so simply explained to me today, its like this: Imagine there is a car accident, and 10 people witness it. They all saw the same exact accident, but they only saw it from their own perspective, so to hear them explain what they saw, you might think you were hearing about 10 different crashes. That's how it works with God. He reveals certain things to each of us, and we only know those things. Trying to describe Him is impossible, but we can all describe what God has meant to our lives. We cant know more than that. We're only seeing a small part of the picture.

We cant possibly use knowledge to explain God, but we can use our personal knowledge to explain our faith in God and what He means to us. We make an elaborate and beautiful picture of Him when we put all of our stories together, but we cant see it. We can only see our piece of the puzzle. I love my piece, God gave it to me so that I could be a part of his work. I'm going to use what he's given to me to fit into the picture, instead of trying to put it together myself.

Basically, all I want to say is that you should try to truly love everyone for their differences. Just because I don't like Katrina sometimes (no offense) because we disagree on something doesn't mean that I wouldn't do anything for her if she needed me. I would be there for anyone, even if I might act like I hate them, because how can I deny someone in a time of need when I am constantly in a time of need and I am never ever ever denied by God? I love being able to see God through someone else's eyes, even if I don't fully understand. I love the way God is so completely outside of our knowledge, yet so available through faith. Thanks to Katrina for being the antithesis of me in this situation, even though she isn't really in real life. (Except for that whole Bieber thing...)

That's all I got for now, gonna go sleep fools. Hopefully this makes some sense. Outtie.

Favorite things- Friendly debates, pool parties. :)

Least favorite things- Tim's lameness for not being at pool parties, Stephen's lameness for working. Katrina's ability to say what she means too well to argue with...

Pursuit.

Pursuing is the innate desire of man. We want to go after things, fight for them, win them. It's part of becoming a man. What you pursue in a way dictates the kind of man you become.

When I was a child, I didn't have to pursue anything. Some might say that I pursued happiness, but happiness was just something that I had as a child. I didn't need much to bring a smile to my face. But growing up has a way of erasing that smile. I quickly learned that things given to me offered less joy than things I worked for. Developing a work ethic is something that you have to do as a man. This is part of the big change in life for men. If you spend your life avoiding work, it comes with depression. We're built that way. If we don't feel like we're needed, then we feel completely useless.

When I started growing up, I spent my time pursuing many things. Things that I thought would make me feel more secure, wanted, important. Things that made me feel significant. I ended up in a lot of places that I didn't want to be. I ended up getting in lots of fights and letting myself get carried away with things when I shouldn't have. I ended up in Colorado, away from anything that was familiar to me. I wish I could say that's where I learned my lesson. But I didn't. I let myself continue on the same path until I was forced to walk the wilderness. I learned a lot about Buddhism while I was there. I learned some tools to help acquire inner peace. I may not look it, but I am actually a very intuitive person. I see the inner workings of people many times. I am very good at seeing inside myself and changing myself now. All this only confused my faith, though. I started asking questions about why God exists or does things the way he does. Being there was great for my attitude, but bad for my soul.

When I finally made it home after all my "adventures", I started to figure things out again. I lost some of the inner peace, maybe, but I gained a lot of myself back. I started to pursue my life again. Once again, though, I found myself pursuing the wrong things. I thought that having more friends or a girlfriend or popularity would make me whole. I tried all of those things. They found me more hurt than I could have imagined. My friends ended up not being as trustworthy as I originally thought, girls turned out to be crazier than I was, and as for popularity? Well, lets just say that I'm not always so well-liked.

Pursuing all this only made me tired of life and more depressed. Thinking that I needed other people for my own happiness was my biggest downfall. I let too many people in, and some of them did a lot of damage. Not that I blame them, I was probably just as bad for them as they were for me. Recovering from my state of pain has taken me a while, and sometimes, it still hurts, but for now I'm doing okay. I have decided to stop pursuing anything that I don't need for right now.

I have decided to reinvent myself for the better. So now, I'm pursuing myself. Trying to figure out what I want to be a part of in this life, and what I want to stay away from. I'm trying my hardest to do all this through God. Sometimes its hard to focus on Him when life feels so busy, but He's always there for me. It's great to know that when people aren't reliable, God always is. :)

I've found at least one major passion in my life. MUSIC. :D I'm going to be focusing my creative energy on that until I find something better. That's all I've got for today, and maybe soon I'll write about music in depth. Outtie.

Favorite things- Avatar (The animated TV show), Mike Kalombo beats, candy!

Least favorite things- boredommmmm...

Temptation.

Mood- self deprecation.

When I picture temptation, I get a mental picture of demons with swords and weapons fighting angels all around me, who are desperately trying to get my attention. They are vastly outnumbered, and sadly I am counted amongst those against them too many times. They fight hard for me out of the love that God has for me, yet I do nothing to fight the temptations. I don't call out for help, I don't turn away. I face the temptation and do what I want. So much so that a root of temptation has now become a tree, and Satan need not tempt anymore, but just remind me of sin. One little thing and I'm right back to the worst in me. I act like some sort of spiritual warrior when people are looking, but I don't fight. I ignore God as much as I can so that I don't feel guilty, and I only let him in when I'm done sinning and I feel comfortable with him again. What kind of sick relationship is this that I have created with Him? Should I not turn to him in my hour of need, instead of these sinful comforts? They do not cease the pain, they ease the pain. For a while. Then it comes back worse than ever. I wish I could say this is the moment, the night when everything changed and that from now on I make an honest stand against the evils of this world and the other, but I know that it will be harder tomorrow than it was today, and I will eventually fall. But this IS the moment, this IS the night when I look to God to pick me up, instead of using comforting sins to make my pit more like home. God, help me to be someone who fights, and never turns over against your will. Make it only as hard as I can bear, Lord, and please do not surpass my limits. From a human deserving no mercy or requests of help, I beg for forgiveness and strength. That's all for tonight. Outtie.

Favorite things- Dumbfoundead, Jeremiah 20:11, Chiddy Bang.

Least favorite things- Internet lag, Danger Close Noob Tubes, Temptation.

First Blog.

Friday- July 16th, 2010

2:21 AM

This little project is gonna make me hate typing so fast. I can feel it. I have so much to say most of the time and I just don't really like to keep it bottled up to be forgotten, so I thought about starting a video blog channel on Youtube, but then I decided that I just didn't really want to make a channel that I would be updating so much. I don't want people to have to feel like I'm overloading them if I decide to rant a lot. Then I remembered this fantastic little site. :) And now I have my own little medium to annoy with all the weird things I think of! This blog will be mostly used when I have something important to write, not so much when I want to "diary." Tonight I decided to start, because I just could not get to sleep. I have insomnia so my posts will probably be added late at night a lot. Anyways, to the people who read this, enjoy! And please let me know if you have any questions to ask me, or any comments. I want to do this to know what others think about what I think. I think I will be adding a note at the end of each post that says my favorite thing(s) of the day and least favorite thing(s) of the day. That sounds like fun. So that will wrap up the post for tonight, as I now have nothing left to say. Outtie.

Favorite things- Paramore music, the movie Defendor

Least favorite things- People obsessed with neutrality. (Maybe I'll explain later...)